Dealing With the Emotions of Cancer

What kind of emotions can I expect to feel?

Your feelings during this time can be intense and rapidly change as you experience a new reality and a lot of new information. It is important to remember that your feelings are valid and normal, even if they feel intense. No person goes through this time in the same way, so try to avoid comparing your experience with other people. Here are some of the emotions you may feel:

• Shock
• Stress
• Uncertainty
• Fear, panic, or worry
• Guilt
• Anger
• Sadness
• Loneliness
• Helplessness

These are difficult emotions to cope with. You may feel out of control with your normal routine being disrupted. You may not be able to enjoy the things you used to enjoy, and you may feel angry that you have to go through this. You may also feel sadness at having a serious disease and the uncertainty that comes with that. All of these reactions are normal and an important part of the process. It may be challenging, but there may be ways to help you cope with your cancer.

How can I manage my feelings?

There are things that you can try to help yourself feel better even though you may feel as though nothing can help the overwhelming feelings during this time. Small efforts can help you cope with your cancer.

Share your feelings

Receiving emotional support in the form of expressing your feelings may help you let go of the tension you feel. You can turn to your friends or family, other cancer survivors, a support group, or a counselor/therapist.

Stay present

Do your best to take each day, hour, and moment as it comes and not look too far ahead during this uncertain time. Try to focus on what you need to get done in the moment, even if that is resting, simply taking a deep breath, or a walk around the block.

Draw, write, or sing

You may not be ready to share all your feelings with people, but you can share them privately in the form of self-expression. It may help to write out the emotions you feel or draw them. You can also listen to loud music and sing to get out the intense emotions you may feel.

Avoid self-blame

The causes of cancer are varied and can be unpredictable. Cancer can happen to anyone and it is a tragic part of being a human being. Try to avoid thinking about getting cancer because of what you did or did not do.

Exercise and eat well

Diet, movement, and staying hydrated can greatly affect your emotions. Eating well, staying as active as you can and keeping yourself hydrated can help your body cope with cancer and its side effects.

Find ways to relax

Focus on activities that help you relieve stress, relax, and distract from your feelings. You can try practicing meditation or mindfulness. Or you can cultivate creative, relaxing hobbies like woodworking, photography, reading, or crafts. Engaging with other cultural expressions like art, movies, music, or dance may help you process your emotions in a relaxing way.

Control what you can and let go of the rest

Keeping yourself in communication with your healthcare team, staying organized with your cancer care plan and medications, and adjusting what you can with your lifestyle are all within your control. Focusing on what you can do each day to stay as healthy as possible will help you from focusing on the uncertain aspects of cancer you cannot control.

You may not be able to do all these things each day, but you can work on each one step by step. Take things slow and be gentle with yourself. This is a difficult moment, so take the time you need to learn how to cope with your condition.